Post-Scripting on a Networking Sunset

Chat

a smile, an embrace
tender arms and ten;  their hearts
a walk through the woods
in the middle of the night
a boy by your good side,
with another on sms (or five)
whispering sweet nothings,
copying the Americans
their hegemonic media
and their melodic accents.
And you tell your other boy/boys,
through sms
(standard messaging rates apply),
of how you prefer your pancakes
with yesterday’s kiss (from another) still
fresh
on your lips
and the boy beside you
fresh
in your heart.

suddenly you love non-fat milk
suddenly you love Seinfeld,
suddenly you love indie films
suddenly you’re not yourself.

There she is, that ghastly sprite,
that runs through your dreams for tonight
this hour’s crush
Oh, she will break your heart.
But you have many hearts to give
(and zero fucks to leave)
you enjoy the sight
of her red bra
and you know she’s
thinking of you(r)-
Oh, she will break your heart.

and they laugh with you, you’re in love
and they know all your wants, you’re in love
he gets all the women, you’re in love
she has a size-c chest, you’re in love

You’re with another ‘him’
there’s Colgate on his lips,
you don’t like him anymore
move on to this one
fickle hearts are fickle
you tell him you like him
while you forget last night
fickle hearts are fickle,
and he has yours
for now.

She’s stupid for entertaining you,
but you don’t know it.
She’ll dance to the tune you’re singing
and you’ll dance along with her
(One by Swedish House Mafia)
“Let’s go get some milktea”
you say and she goes
she’s yours for the minute
but you don’t care

He added you on Facebook, you’re his first FB friend
let’s chat about youtube and the weather
then we can argue later if we’ll make out
she deleted you on Facebook, you’re really not her friend

It’s all over. Well, not really.
You see her again and act normal.
All her friends don’t know anyway
what you all did when
time was running out of the LCD
quite tipsy and alone
But it’s your favorite memory
one you always play in your sleep
where candles never light and
wounds never cut deep.
She’ll never know for sure
supposed to be banished from your life
teen love feels
nothing like the Disney films

There’s a beautiful boy in your class
he is kind and sweet
like how young crushes are supposed to be
and he makes you feel
like freshly made skin
you think that you like him
but you have a boyfriend
but he’s nothing like him
suddenly you know what you want
Suddenly, you’ll let go just like that
who cares about promises,
you think, we’ve got feelings to give
it’s time to let go.

The smell of dust, and there you are acting innocent
The space is tight, there’s nobody around to see
The air is cold, you’re feeling it real bad
The lights are dim, secretive in seduction

How awkward is this?
What do you say now?
Does he know you love
it when he places his hand
on your leg?
Do you smile or make sounds?
Your bag is in the way
(place it on the other side next time)
You’ll place your hands on his waist,
maybe you’ll tweet about this in an hour.
How awkward is this?
How. Awkward. Is. This.

She’s with another @boy
and you can’t watch
Her letter was #amazing
its gotta be love
all those wonderful promises
you made in that old-school exchange
you can’t look and you feel sick
she sleeps with him
but her letter was amazing
Its gotta be love

she unzipped you,  but doesn’t know what to do
lie down on the grass together, but you don’t know what to do
he tells you he loves you, but doesn’t know what to do
your head is faint, you don’t know what to do.

Now you wake up, and your head is screaming
WHAT THE FUCK THERES NO GOLDEN BOX WITH ALL THE GODS
INVITING ME TO THEIR PALACE TO BLOG ABOUT CUTE LITTLE THINGS
AND WHERE DID MY LIFE GO WRONG
AND WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME
(and now you should know, this is you)
NOT GOOD NOT GOOD NOT GOOD
THE STARS AND THE SHIPS ARE LEAVING ME
FOR GOOD FOR GOOD FOR GOOD
THERE AIN’T NO MAGIC IN THIS WORLD
AND LOVE IS A WORD MADE BY STUPID
FLOWER SALESMEN AND POETS
(is this true? would we know? The kettle is stirring)
I BELIEVED IT AND NOW IM STUPID
I BELIEVED IT AND NOW IM SUFFERING
HEY LETS TWEET ABOUT THIS!
PITY PAAAAARTY AT MY TIMELINE

Benches are empty, yet you two are there
No words are to be said,
just empty, disillusioned stares
He looks at you like a stranger
you stopped caring
your nerves are all showing
wracked brain cells
skimming through what you saw
he doesn’t love you back
you’re paying for what you did
because, of course, in this fairytale world
you need to be #beautiful as shit,
Although he did love you back,
you didn’t care about his problems.
He doesn’t love you anymore
How awkward is this?

Oh she broke your heart.
Now you need to find
another person to give it to
anyone, anybody’s fine
because when youre rejected
it’s you that hurts all over
but when you reject,
it’s you that got it over.
Fickle hearts are fickle,
and that girl is hot
She looks like a slut,
she’ll do fine for tonight.

(Are you even listening to me?)
She whimpers right before the kiss
(This poem is about to end)
Then she gives in and grabs him by the neck

You’re feeling like shit
and the boy beside you is smoking
(Dunhill International, how rich),
you ask him to teach you
you’re enamored,
smile, you’re in #love.
you’re a fucked up bitch LOL
but he doesn’t know that,
let’s see when he’ll figure it out
how long will he stick around?

Her bestfriend is who you like,
but this girl would take her clothes off for you,
soon you’ll have her all over
she’ll show you something you’ve never seen
suddenly you’re not yourself
a great new world awaits
and an #endlesssunset,
you are promised.
You’re probably not the first
(and surely not the last)
all you wanted was love,
and i guess this is it.

_________________________________________

X

Maybe youd understand if we could share our thoughts

sometimes I just want to

sleep until that day i start living.

But I remember that this is life.

i am living;

(and what,

what is

that purpose that

which we breath

and

wake up

falldown

&

inlove.

What

is the purpose of it

@all)

And yet what does

living

mean to me?

Is it that

heartbeating

found in my chest;

waking up to see the

colorful sunrise.

[#to hell

with

all your friends]

i dont know God

I don’t really

know

why i bother to wake up

When life

has nothing planned

in all its

immensity

&

supposed

beauty. I can’t see it sometimes-

i do sometimes

when I look up at the

moon

or when i breath fresh mountain

air.

but right now.

I don’t;

know (@einstein)

what all this is to me

_________________________________________

Tales

I’m leaving once more;

(Don’t cry right now) right now,

There’s nothing for me

here.

Truth is, I am lost.

the comfort of home has made me forget

the person i held myself to be.

I must

go.

[Don’t] Let this be my last goodbye,

I’m going

to see

I,

Will see the dusk crying softly

As the morning dew comes

to wash away

the past.

seep in through the soil. I

need

to find that lost beggar

hammering on the gold coins

That turn up in the mountain side of Mars

You

understand, don’t you?

(Don’t you?)

That noise tinkering

in my head <the white

noise that fills my empty

thoughts> is telling me to walk

more.

And feel the cool midnight,

air brush up against my skin.

(Not too different

than

that time you placed your head on my shoulder)

I

might not,

be coming back,

Hopefully, I. will.

Have you ever seen me

in the red moonlight?

Have you

ever?

And you then maybe you never will.

My dreams are filled

with visions of the time i could not sleep

Do

yours haunt you as well?

I’m excited.

Excited to ride the backseats

Of cars whose owners I won’t remember

Drive, drive, driving into the chaos of

night

of the big open field

of the African elephant graveyards

of

the neverending bitterness of-

of

of

God-

knows-what!

The smells of moist earth permeating

hair and the. stench of dried beer out

in the afternoon sun

When we would.

#doesntmatter

The fables they would tell,

(And I remember a certain

one, about a couple)

I’ll miss them.

&tellthem to others.

Nameless, lost in time, forlorn

that’s what we’ll be too.

won’t we.

It all seems so

minute.

worthless.

We’re here now

then we won’t

be.

What else can you do,

but take this world as your own

[No one’s going to

take it

for you.]

And hope

they’re still saying your name.

I’m not the first

to

see

the dusk cry softly

to find that lost beggar

to feel the

cool midnight air

to go into the chaos

And I won’t be the last.

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